My status update

terasa mcm nak update keje kat ofis la plak... iskkk..

well it has been about a week plus since i was (and still) struggling to maintain my daily milk supply.

so far :

- frozen stok increase to 3 bottles! (yeahaaa!!)
- sofeya still refuse to take FM. dah try isomil, mamil gold and enfagrow. dah try in cup, normal bottle (MLO bottle) and avent bottle. semua TAK MO.
- now she drinks on avg 9 oz (3 x 3oz).
- malam dia belasah gayut habis2an hingga ke titisan terakhir!

hmmmmmmmmmm...

maid cakap actually susu cam tak berapa nak cukup.. but since dia sungguh2 tak mo FM, so maid top up dgn food. kasik makan byk sket so that dia kenyang.

yg bestnyer bila aku offer FM.. sungguh2 dia tolak.. "no no no no no!!!" sambil geleng2 kepala...

sgt comel and pandai. sib baik cakap "NO" jer.. buatnya dia cakap "No thank you.." mmg aku instantly jadik penyokong kuat susu ibu, tak kasik dah baby lain minum FM suruh minum susu badan jer sbb jadik pandai sgt! :P

maid said mebbe tunggu a while klu nak introduce FM balik.. pasal the last time, sofeya cam trauma.. sampai EBM pun dia tanak minum.. gitu la plak...

so skang ni nak tak nak mmg aku postpone buat segala benda yg requires me to leave her (except work lah). nak pegi buat rambut aku pun dah berminggu2 aku postpone!

heran btul la budak nih.. kot la nak jeles tgk cousin2 dia minum susu ke apa.. kot la nak rebut botol ke apa.. tidak pun... aku jenuh la dok provoke dia "tgk tuhhhh... fatiyah (cousin sebaya) minum susu sedappppp.. mintak skettt" boleh pulak sofeya geleng2 kepala "no no no no no"

either mmg hang ni tak suka nak berebut (i doubt!!!) or my milk is super duper yummylicious...:)

but bila balqis minum milo dia sibuk nak berebut! hmm.. maybe i can introduce FM yg perisa coklat eh? tapinyer takut dia berak keras pulak.. hmmm...

suddenly blog ni dah tak mcm BF punya blog eh? hehheheheh

wat look look?? sukati aaa nak minum susu mama!!!

What lies beneath

We were on our way back from Low Yat when Mr Photographer (my husband) asked me the question "apesal susu u makin sikit? naper dulu u kerap pump, sekarang x kerap dah? dulu u asal ada time jer u pump...  u yg cakap kat i makin kerap pump makin byk susu"

Ambik nko soklan bertubi2.

Memula i thought my stock berkurang because aku dok ambik sikit2 and tak ganti balik stock.
Then i thought deeper, and here is the answer that i wanna share.

Like i said in previous post, breastfeeding memerlukan semangat and also willpower yang kuat. Bukan takat nak start and also master in it, but most importantly to sustain in this field.

I dunno about other mommies, but i have my ups and downs. Not in terms of milk supply, but my semangat and willpower.

The truth is people, sometimes i feel tired. I never tot i would say this openly but i guess i need to let it out. Plus, aku bukan nak menakutkan korang or discourage or demotivate korang to breastfeed. No.. not in a million years. Cuma i think you need to know the whole truth, yg elok ke, yang tak elok ke, so that you can prepare yourself emotionally and mentally.

Memang memenatkan. And sometimes uncomfortable, and sometimes menyakitkan.

Dulu aku pump MINIMUM 5 kali sehari.
7.30 am, 10.30 am, 1.30pm, 4.30pm and 8.30pm.

There are times yang aku bangun tgh2 mlm nak pump pasal sofeya tidur lena tak bangun nyusu.

Then as she grows up, she nurses more frequently especially tgh2 mlm. Her perangai berubah, bukan takat nak nyusu, but she also wants to bergayut mlm. So i cut down the midnite pumping session.

Then she grows up lagi, and tidur lewat sket mlm. I find it impossible to pump at 8.30pm coz time tu la dia nak main, nak nenen etc. So i cut down that pump session.

Then makin dia besar, dah makan solid, demand for susu pun not as much. So, beralasankan itu, plus aku sendiri kepenatan terkejar2 pagi2 nak siap itu ini, i cut down pulak 7.30am punya session.

Now, tinggal 3 pumping session yg aku masih buat kat ofis.

And sometimes i force myself to pump.

Terukkan aku?


So yeah.. my susu berkurang sebab sikap aku sendiri.

I'm not complaining, coz i know, susah payah, usaha aku ni tak sia2. I get the benefit, anak2 aku pun sihat, plus, setiap titik susu tu kan Allah berikan pahala?

Byk cara nak remedy the situation sebenarnya... like..
- remind yourself of the benefits
- talk to rakan seperjuangan
- read abt it.. masukla susuibu.com.. baca forum, mesti semangat balik.

Farah.. tolongla ketuk kepala aku kasik sedar sikit!

Selamat Hari Raya

err.. better late than never kan?

sorry, coz been neglecting this blog for quite some time.
truth is busy, and malas, and just seem dono what to write.

yes i am still breastfeeding.. alhamdulillah. sofeya is 15 mths now.
however, my frozen stock dah berkurangan SIGNIFICANTLY. sampai laki aku yg tak pernah perasan berapa byk stok aku pun bleh terkejut tgk..."eh apsal susu u dah sikit?"

like that u know.. dulu sampai melimpah ruah freezer aku..
skang.. siap buleh taruk aiskrim lagi kat tempat yg dulu solely just for susu.

but i have only myself to blame.
-time posa pump 2 x jer...

and MAIN reason is, sometimes, bila aku kuar kejap2.. like gi groceries for 1-2 hrs, aku tak bwk pump. BUT sofeya kat rumah will drink EBM. So once in a while maybe nampak ok.. alahh..sebotol jer..

but i tell u.. one botol after another.. week after week.. and few mths later.. and waddayaknow...tetiba nampak stok susu makin sikit.. WHY? sbb tu lah.. bila ambik susu botol, tak pump & ganti.

so lesson of the day..

ko kuar kejap mana pun, klu dah ambik stok susu, make sure ganti ler... skang ni aku gi tesco ampang yg hanya 6 minit perjalanan tu pun (6 minit klu Mr Photographer bwk ler..) aku pump jugak. (pump dlm keter la.. ko jgn pump time tgh beli sayur tu plak..)

another lesson of the day..

klu agak2 ada perangai malas mcm aku ni.. rajin2 ler buat stok masa dlm pantang. sbb susu masa pantang PALING MEWAH. so klu tetiba dtg angin malas, ada jugak stok nak standby.

tapi lesson paling penting adalah JANGAN MALAS.

Org malas selalu rugi.

PAHAM?

Citer lain.

Haritu aku encounter sorang doctor yg cetek ilmu bfeeding. Memula dia puji aku kurus. Aku cakap ler pasal aku bfeed. Pas tu dia bukak ceramah patutnya dah kena campur formula pasal after 1 yr susu ibu dah kurang vitamin & nutrient. Pas tu yg paling aku hangin sekali stmt dia adalah..

"Of course bfeeding is good for you.. you dont get breast cancer, you can slim down but its not good for the baby. U should top up formula...."

So.. indirectly.. the ngok doctor is implying.. AKU NI BFEED SBB SELFISH lah ek?

YOUR HEAD BRAIN LAH DOCTOR!!!

aku sacrifice my time, effort, my leisure.. etc just nak ensure anak aku dpt breastmilk.. and you say i do it becoz of my own self interest???

nko gilo ke hapo?

Sakit lah!!!!

Lately ni Sofeya suka menggigit. Mentang2 dah ada 4 batang gigi (2 atas, 2 bawah). So dgn sedapnya dia menggesel2 kan gigi kat nipple aku. Dia buat mcm gigit plastesin jer. Sabo jer la.

Aku dok baca dlm BF forums, klu jadi camni, we can ajar the baby not to gigit. How? Well we can start by saying a stern NO. Then klu buat lagi we can withdraw the breast from the baby, nak tunjuk yg dia buat tu salah.

Aku? Well dah try no, dah try withdraw.. TAK JALAN.

Aku dah terjerit terpekik terlolong SAKIT!!!! Pun TAK JALAN.

Jenuh dah tutup2 breast konon2 tak mau bagi dia nenen klu dia gigit. Jalan la jugak kdg2, but some time later dia gigit jugak.

Few days ago, while pumping, I noticed darah kuar along with the milk. Adeh laaaa… Check2, rupanya ada KESAN GIGIT! Dalam jugak tuh.. ada la dlm 1mm dalam. (1mm is considered dalam and pedih if related to nipples!)

Nak buat mcm mana? Breast dah penuh, takkan tak nak pump? Tahan jer la pedih, but I shortened the pumping session, normally would go until 15 mins, but this time aku buat 10 mins je. Tak tahan beb!

Then after pumping, aku sapu sikit bmilk, anginkan breast for few minutes, baru pakai bra. Few days jugak la aku pumping mcm ni. Klu nyusu direct ok, tak pedih (as long as sofeya tak gigit). Furthermore I read somewhere that air liur baby akan bagi the luka lagi baik cepat.

Skang alhamdulillah dah okay. Tapi ada sket la trauma everytime tgk mulut dia luas nganga get ready nak NGAP